My Ex Rant...Yeah, I am feeling bitchy today

I met my first "true" boyfriend when I was 21. My mother had just passed away, and I was continually going to the local gay bar with my friends even though the bar was 45 miles away. My friend Brandon had met Doug at the bar and ended up letting Doug move in with him shortly after that. Doug was the type of guy that could and would talk to anybody and would become instant friends with them. Doug was also famous for dating many, many guys. If they were still dating after 3 weeks, you knew they would be broken up within the following week. And of course, Doug would be on to the next guy.

Brandon and I went a drag show at the bar (so it was on a Sunday night, the only night they had drag shows) and were going to meet Doug and his new guy. For whatever reason, we ended standing behind the bar next to the dance floor. I remember thinking that Mark, Doug's current fling, was actually pretty hot. Nice body and nice smile. Plus he seemed to be very friendly. A few cocktails (or maybe 10 or more) later, I was standing behind Doug and Mark (arms around each other) and I was grabbing Mark's ass. That is very out-of-character for me. At one point, Mark turned around and smiled.

A few weeks later, Doug announced that him and Mark were through, he had found a new man. BLAH BLAH BLAH...YADDA YADDA YADDA. Same story, different day. I ran into Mark a few months after that, we chatted for a little bit and exchanged phone numbers. We ran into each other a few times at the bar (after all, there was nothing else to do in this town for gay men besides the adult bookstores). After 6 months of just meeting at the bar, we finally started dating. Unlike Doug, I was with Mark for 7 years. That is until he dumped me for somebody much younger than me. The sad fact is that Mark is 9 years older than me and his new guy is 9 years younger than me. 18 years is a big gap. But Mark and I broke up 11 years ago and they are still "together".

Now let's get down to the bitch part of this post. I used "together" in quotes for a reason. I talk to Mark about once every 6 months (if even that). It is usually just a quick hello and then we are on our way. But lately, Mark has taken to posting on Craigslist's personal ads. And not only is he posting his ad, he is posting naked pics of himself with his face pic. But my biggest gripe is that he says he is 37. 37????? He just turned 49 in 2008. He will be 50 this year. The one thing I cannot stand is LIARHEADS (sorry Carol, I am still stealing that word!)

Of course, if I was Mark, the thing I would be worried about is his boyfriend. The boyfriend hates gay people (must hate himself too) and used to be an officer of the local NRA chapter. Yeah, the gun people. I am just glad that I am out of that mess. But honestly Mark, STOP POSTING YOUR NAKED BUTT AND FACE PIC AND FAKE AGE at least 4 times a week on Craigslist. It just makes you look very desperate!