A Bean Can Begin an Adventure

"The difference between a cow and a bean, is a bean can begin an adventure." - Into the Woods

Tomorrow starts a new beginning for me. The path isn't that far from where I was before, but as with all new adventures, there is always some fear of the unknown to begin with. Tomorrow is the first day of my new job. Today is day number 76 of being unemployed, that is 76 days of hatred, fear, depression and loss of hope. Sadly, I have been through worst times in my life. The deaths of my parents, my partner and my best friend all rank up there as some of my worst time periods. So with me knowing worse times, I was able to keep my head above water all of this time. So the hatred I felt towards my last cowardly employer is now nothing more that a sense of shame for their lack of the respect and the dignity that I thought they had. The fear and the depression that grew out of that fear are nothing more than the constant reminder that I am only human. And the loss of hope from all of those job applications that were never answered, or the few interviews that turned out to be nothing more than a waste of time, or the 4 week battle I have had to fight for this new job. All of those were never able to overcome my optimism that there is something better out there for me.

This new job might not be the greatest job out there. It definitely isn't my dream job. But it is a job. And like every other job I have had in the past, I will go in there and give them 110%. And it will definitely be nice to start receiving an income again. The sad part is that this blog will go back to being a part-time hobby for me. So will the ClassifiedAds website. Even the over-the-top Fiesta Sunday and Hump Night Chats will be at the mercy of my work schedule. And I will really miss those guys when I have to work, they are the ones who really helped me stay sane all this time! I also owe a huge thanks to Douglass. Even though we have had our problems in the past, he has always been there for me. I don't tell him very often how special he is to me, but i think he knows how I feel. Thanks D.